


A New Assignment

by AquilaTempestas



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: A little bit of wine never hurt, F/M, Humour, Parody, Romance, Writer's Block
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 03:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29236737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquilaTempestas/pseuds/AquilaTempestas
Summary: With help from Cassandra, Varric finds a new couple to write about for his next romance novel.
Relationships: Female Hawke/Sebastian Vael, Hawke/Sebastian Vael
Kudos: 2





	A New Assignment

It was the best of days. The skies were absent of any cloud. The issue with the darkspawn in the Deep Roads had been dealt with, and they had even managed to bring down Corypheyus. Sure, things could’ve been better – a lot of people had died – but things were finally starting to look up. Now all Varric had to do was write it all down on paper and make things more dramatic. People didn’t want to read the truth. Well, not the _whole_ truth. A few additions here and there would do no harm.

Picking up his quill, he hunched over his desk, and started scribbling down a few notes for his story about the Inquisition. He only managed to write down half a word when he heard footsteps approaching. He looked up and sighed. Cassandra.

“Have you completed the next installed of _Swords and Shields,_ Varric?” Cassandra said, looking left and right, as if to ensure no members of the Inquisition were nearby. Only two people were aware of her fascination with romance novels, and she wanted to keep it that way. People didn’t need to know Cassandra had a soft side.

Laying down his quill, he flashed her a smirk and said, “I’ve been trying to think, but the ideas simply aren’t coming, Seeker.” Truthfully? He had no intentions of writing another edition of _Swords and Shields._ The last edition was still selling well - people were very interested in the romance of Evelyn the Inquisitor and Cullen – and he saw no reason to write another edition anytime soon.

“But you must have something!”

He shook his head. “I’m afraid I’m all out of ideas. Here’s an idea - why don’t you try and write something?”

“Oh, I could never!” she exclaimed. “Please, Varric. You must. You are the best author.”

He grinned. How could he refuse? “Only because you asked so nicely, Seeker. I will try, but I need some help.”

“Anything!”

He grinned, amused by her eagerness. “I’m a great writer, I know, but it’s not easy coming up with ideas here. There’s only so many stories I can write about the Inquisitor and Commander Cullen. I mean, the table was really the main character here, and that gets a bit stale after awhile. I’m surprised that table is still standing.” Sera had proven quite useful. He thought he had eyes and ears on everyone, but the table had been news to him.

“It is a sturdy table,” Cassandra replied. ‘That was my favourite chapter.”

“So, if I’m going to write another edition, I need a new couple to write about. New pairing. Fresh ideas. Different perspectives. What can you recommend?”

Cassandra looked thoughtful, rubbing her chin, brows furrowed in deep concentration. “Oh! I have an idea. The Prince of Starkhaven will be arriving by nightfall upon the Inquisitor’s request.”

Varric thought hard. “Choir-boy?” He remembered Sebastian Vael. They had countless friendly competitions over who was better at archery. Obviously, Varric was the better archer, but he had let Choir-Boy think he was superior. “What for?” It wasn’t that he disliked the ranger’s company; the man made for a decent companion when he wasn’t busy reciting the teachings of the Chantry. But he was hard to tolerate when he was feeling preachy. Had Hawke finally gotten him to abandon his vows? She had never mentioned it.

“To strengthen the alliance between Starkhaven and the Inquisition,” Cassandra explained.

That made sense. The Inquisition had lost the friendship of the Qunari after Iron Bull’s betrayal and had to look elsewhere for new alliances. Although Corypheus had fallen, the Inquisition had enemies elsewhere. The priority was learning more about Solas and the elf’s intentions. “Let me get this straight, Seeker. You want me to talk to Sebastian and Hawke about their love life? They don’t have a love life.”

“They are married.”

“A _chaste_ marriage, Seeker. You know what means. Where is the audience for that?”

He wondered what their marriage ceremony had been like. Did they even exchange a kiss? What did his family think? He was the direct heir to the throne and that came with many responsibilities other than ruling and making decisions.

“But you can make it up. You are an author.”

“It’s hard to imagine anything exciting happening in such an arrangement, Seeker.”

“So, you should ask them. You and Hawke are close friends are you not?”

Varric sighed. That was going to make for an awkward conversation. Somehow, he didn’t imagine walking up to Choir-Boy and asking him about their sex life would end well. The boy would either avoid the topic and walk away to pray fervently or change the topic and hope Varric would not bring it up again. On the other hand, Hawke was not a problem. Hawke would tell him anything.

“I will be waiting eagerly for the final product.”

“I’ll be sure to give you the first draft.”

Never had he seen the Seeker so happy. It made him smile too. The woman had been under a lot of stress recently, and rarely had a chance to laugh and smile. “Well. I best go and see Choir-Boy then. Maybe I’ll loosen him up a little first, so he’ll be more willing to talk. You think he’ll be up for a game of Wicked Grace beforehand?

Cassandra shrugged. “I will give him the invitation and inform the others, but I do not think Cullen will agree… Especially after what happened last time.”

Right. Cullen had ended up losing his clothes. An amusing moment and one he made sure not to let the commander forget. “That’s all right. We don’t need blondie.” After a pause he added, “I’ll let you welcome them all. I’ll set up a game of Wicked Grace.” And ensure the wine was strong enough to make Sebastian talk.

“Thank you again, Varric.”

“No need, Seeker.”

**Author's Note:**

> Part two to come at some point in the future. Even though I’ve been a fan of the games since day one, I never had the courage to write for it. So, here’s hoping this turned out okay. Hopefully, this was somewhat humorous and entertaining?


End file.
